So I tried asking out a girl...

What the hell do electric motors have to do with it?

 

ah yes can vouch for this it is true from personal experience, according to the evolution of the mating ritual of human beings any lone predator or man is desperate and any prey or woman must take note of this sign that the predator is not an "Alpha" but beta and could pose a threat to her survival and possibly that of her future offspring.

This lone predator or beta male would most likely not be to able perform the duties of a good hunter gatherer for a litter as a Pack hunter male would who hunts for women with one or more "wingmen" because pack hunters in nature have shown to be better at surviving the elements than lone hunters.

 

how wrong you are depends on if you're a man or woman this week.

 

agreed this topic does raise a little gender bias

 

How can you be "in love" with someone you've never even been out with once.

If she shows no interest after the first 2-3 times you ask her out, then she's not interested at all - and you don't have to tell her "I won't ask you out anymore" - you've got no obligation to her - just let her go. As far as her "hating you", unless you've been a stalker (ex. texting/following/calling her constantly) then she'd have no reason to "hate" you, but she's not into you - and whether or not she "hates" you is irrelevant - that kind of thinking will keep you acting like a wuss, if you act like a guy who's dependent on a woman's "approval" you won't attract women - and unless you did something morally wrong (ex. stalked her, threatened her, hit her, etc), you have no reason to give a flying f-k if she "hates" you or not - it's not your problem, it's hers.

Don't be such a "nice guy" bro, plus there are plenty of fish in the sea - she's no more worthy than any of the other 3.5 billion girls on the planet. Go find a girl who's interested.

 

Odd, that seems to always work out pretty good for me - I can just sit there alone looking pretty and get some easy action, even without making the first move - it gets me noticed better - works better than hanging around with some dorky guy friend.

 

That's creepy. You don't know her but "she's the one you want"? Why, did Jesus come to you in a dream and tell you to marry her?

Well that's how she's thinking of it anyway - bottom line is you can't be in love with someone you don't know, there's nothing about her that you "want" that you couldn't want about any other girl, and what you're feeling isn't love, it's just a desire to have "a girl" in a general sense. Find one who wants you back.

 

It's not cheating if you're not in a committed relationship. He should just go out with girls and have fun w/o actually being their boyfriend, then it's not cheating

lol okay...

 

So what do you guys do? Get in arranged marriages? How do you even get to know someone or find a meaningful relationship if you just shack up with the first guy/girl you ever talk to? That sounds more like something out of the Medieval era.

 

Easy action. Proving the entire point...

 

But it works - I thought that was the whole point of your comment, that it was a bad tactic.

 

DO NOT TELL HER you arent gonna ask her out anymore. from now on when you ask a woman out and she declines dont act like it hurt your pride, just say ok and act as if it never happened and just talk to her like normal. sometimes things just take time, even a year or 2.

it stings a bit to get rejected, but you gotta just let it fly right off and move on. the woman im with now shot me down when i first asked her out, and she was really mean about it lol. but i just moved on and didnt pay no attention, went on like it didnt even bother me. 3 months later all the sudden we started seeing more of eachother, not thinking anything of it because we share the same group of friends. then it was weird but we finally realized we had spent 9 straight months just hangin out, no dates or anything but we were just around eachother all the time. almost a year and a half from the time i first asked her out she hits me on the arm, looks at me and simply asks "why havent you asked me out again???" . lol we been together ever since.

basically, just gotta try and let stuff happen, dont force it. patience is a virtue when you are chasing the woman you wanna be with. get shot down, oh well dont get desperate. be patient, hang out and get to know her, let her see how you are. if she likes you she will stick around and hang out, if not then just work on something else. but whatever you do DO NOT act like it bothers you and leave the desperate acts in the trash. desperation=creepy.

 

The point was, it's dangerous to interact with loners.

 

I turned my ex down 3 times and then stood him up 3 more times before turning up for a date.

 

There are all different types, attracted to all different types. I don't know who would want to pick up a woman at the bar anyway. I've had success just being alone in different situations. A lot of that just depends on the person's overall appearance anyway. The look in their eye. A person who looks creepy isn't going to redeem himself by being with 20 other guys. I lived in a small town, about 500, when I was a teenager. I had hooked up with half the girls, but the other half wouldn't give me the time a day. Shaved my stache and goatee for a wedding, and for the next year got the other half. Facial hair was what turned that half off. All different types out there.

I would like to address your "women should never make 1st move or give the guy power" comment. 1st off, as soon as someone talks about power in a relationship someone should run, for those are the absolute worst relationships regardless who has it. 2nd, American girls break the hearts of young boys left and right. It takes a decade, from 16-26, for the good guys to learn to thicken their skin. A lot of the good guys leave this period shell shocked. The guy from America who didn't have his heart broke when young is the last guy you want, for it means he doesn't have one. By the time women are figuring out what they want in America, a lot of guys are giving up, and don't want to put themselves out there for a process they only know as inevitable pain. I don't know about Scotland, but if a woman in America won't make the 1st move and wonders why she always ends up with creeps, it is time for her to sink teeth into that good guy. You won't have to make a move after that, nature will take over.

 

He is however, going to display some behaviours which potentially give some indication of how sociable he is, how he interacts with people, if he's fun to be with, if people like him, if he can hold a conversation, if he is known and liked and accepted by people who know him then he's more likely not to be the village axe murderer or he'd be alone etc etc etc. It's basic security. Not overlooking if he does anything unpleasant, people know where to find him/you if a lot of people know him. There is some kind of accountability.

My friends fixed on one loner they called Adonis, but his name was daft Andy and his family had a bolt missing. I knew this because I was at school with him. He was indeed very gorgeous, but weird. One of my friends met him via another route and dated him until her best friend had the pervert phone calls traced to his number and he was arrested.

Why are loners alone, that is the question.

Anyway, you hopefully understand the point.

I do not like the facial hair. Is it on or off at the moment?

Did you read the post I was responding to? The guy thinks he has women all worked out and under control according to his game plan. Women equally can work it all out and see through that kind of (*)(*)(*)(*) whenever they want to, i.e. not be manipulated by controlling males.

I don't speak for all Scottish women, but a young guy I know has more women than appear on America's Next Top Model, so I don't think it's all one way traffic. I made a comment he must be quite keen on this one as he'd seen her 3 or 4 times in the week. Turns out to be 3 different girls...

 

Your Ex.
You are a bad example.

 

I married him.

 

Nowadays, I'm 48, I very rarely find a woman worthy enough for me to ask her out. When I do find one I usually don't ask her out because she's married.

The ones I like think I'm too old for them.
I like them still alive and bouncy and not worn out or burnt out on life.
The women my age who are single are usually (*)(*)(*)(*)(*)es whom nobody would want to date. You know women with chips on their shoulders who think all men are crap are women I want nothing to do with. I don't care why they think that I don't want to deal with the walls they put up. I refuse to jump their hurdles proving I'm not somebody else. (*)(*)(*)(*) em. It's not worth the time or trouble dealing with their emotional baggage.

 

Why would a woman who thinks all men are crap, ever date a man anyway?

 

Then divorced him and took all his money.

 

Because the want a man who will put up with their (*)(*)(*)(*) while paying all the bills and handing over their hard earned cash. They want some idiot who'll pay for their ass without any return on their investment other than the occasional nut.

 

Lol...not really. Ethics don't allow it. And women can earn their own living these days. However, we had a family and a decent roof had to continue to be provided. I took the house and he didn't pay a penny in maintenance. We were both happy with that.

I can't say I understand all that bitterness nonsense. The guy is my family. We stood outside the supermarket last week discussing his brother, who has just been diagnosed terminal. We both nursed my Dad at home to the end of terminal cancer and went through that together. He was as scarred by it as any of us. There are very few people in the world who mean as much to me as that man does. I don't want to live with him, but I love him and don't want anything bad ever to happen to him. Apart from which, my son needs him.

 

Ah. Give all your money to me then and you will henceforth not have that worry. If you don't have it, you will know any woman who takes you on is interested in you, not what you can do for her.

Unless you're a carpenter or plumber. You know. Useful.

I'm joking....joking...

 

Hear ya my problem is the women I can't afford to ask out are the ones I deem worthy and the ones I can afford to ask out I want nothing to do with.

Its hard to find good return on investments these days....