Two different stories about consent and "rape", a paradox

I got sick of reading @kazenatsu warped beliefs on page 12. If you are married, your wife needs to get away from you as fast as she can. You treat woman as nothing more than a receptacle for a penis.

Do you not think it’s highly traumatizing to be raped by somebody you trust. It’s not only the body that gets violated, it’s trust and intimacy. There is no pleasure or niceness of having your own husband force his penis inside you after you have said no. It’s rape. There are not different kinds of rape, rape is rape.

Marital rape victims suffer long-lasting physical and psychological injuries that are often severe or more severe than victims of a stranger rape experience. Look at the research.

Are you unable to separate sex from rape. Rape is not about the sex. Sex has little to do with it; for a man who rapes his spouse, sex has become a weapon, the way to accomplish the desired result, which is to harm, control, embarrass, and humiliate the spouse. The expectation in marriage that sex will be an act between the couple to show their love. Rape in a marriage is not sex.

Are you totally devoid of any sense, a woman doesn’t have to scream and fight and kick for it to be rape. What if there are children in the house. One doesn’t have to behave a certain way during a rape. Often fighting back and screaming cause more intense violence.

There is no level of surrendering consent — NO MEANS NO whether married or not.

Marriage also tells the whole world that you are marrying the love of your love, you are not giving consent to be raped.
Rape is a crime, whether within a marriage or otherwise. It is horrible, inhumane, and not an acceptable behaviour in any relationship.

Forcing sex on one’s spouse is rape; it is not an act of love, respect and support; it is an act of power and violence.

Marital rape breaks the marriage vows, and marriage does not give a spouse the license to rape his wife with impunity. Which part of raping your wife would you consider ‘love, honouring, and cherishing’?

Your views are downright disgusting, misogynistic, and dangerous to women. Don’t bother responding with any of your drivel. I won’t be reading it.

 

It is about both power AND sex.

Absolutely. And that is so even if one argues that she violates the marriage contract by saying no. Perhaps her saying no should be grounds for divorce or infidelity, but that still wouldn't mean she can't say no.

The marriage may be based on expectations of sex with the woman, but it also may be based on expectations of provision by the man. What if the man quits his job and refuses to get another and won't provide for the family as he promised to (which isn't all marriages)? Perhaps you could argue that violates their agreement and is grounds for divorce or infidelity, but does that justify the wife enslaving him? No, of course not. And agreements to sex ahead of time doesn't justify rape if she changes her mind later.

Not just to women. To men too. Men also need to consent.

I would give some consideration to somebody who rapes a spouse if they thought they had consent because they had ongoing consent. I don't think they need to ask every time they touch their spouse. It can ruin the mood for both of them.

If they have a history of sneaking up on each other and groping each other or waking each other up with sex, etc, then I wouldn't consider it rape if one of them changed their mind and didn't tell the other.

Same would apply if they have agreed to BDSM and consensual non-consent (roleplaying rape) and there is misunderstanding. It's important to have an impossible to forget safe word. A good one is "safe word".