Why won't some people answer Yes or No questions?

No, the guy started talking to me I was just sitting in the office minding my own business like I normally do. It was just the two of us talking. People tend to enjoy talking to me a lot mainly because since I am rarely ever interested in getting into an actual discussion they are free to just sit there and ramble on and on about whatever they please. At least half the time during the day the chair opposite my desk is occupied by a random co worker who is bored and wants to talk about whats on their mind. "You're a good listener", I suppose but it's mainly because regardless of what you say I'll just keep quiet and let you talk for the most part. If I want to actively discuss something with someone then I'll seek them out.

Sometimes during someones thinking out loud sessions they will mention something that I am actually curious about and I might want to ask them a question about it. Such as the case above. But more often than not I sit there and smile and/or laugh with them and nod my head. I do listen and hear what people say but unless it's personally interesting to me and I want more information on it I'll simply keep quiet and let them talk. I would probably not even have asked the guy about how old he thought the Earth was if he didn't ask me FIRST. His question to me sparked my interest, he was curious as to how old I thought the Earth was so in turn I became curious about how old HE thought the Earth was because I am an Astronomy nerd. Nothing more nothing less.

See again you are making assumptions about my intentions based upon what you believe from what I have said. That is where we differ and that is where I believe a lot of issues come about. People assume things. I don't like to assume things which is why I just ask direct questions.

In order to understand exactly what my intentions were when I asked that question you could have simply asked me and I would have told you. Like I said I'm an open book I'll tell you the truth. But instead of asking me directly you came to the conclusion that my motive was to win a discussion/debate, in this case you were incorrect in your assumption which could have been easily clarified if you would have just simply asked me.

A member not too long ago pretty much put me in my place for doing that to him. We were talking about gay marriage on the forum and he made a few statements and I turned around and said something like "You act like gay people are contagious and you can become gay if they touch you or something, you act like the world is about to collapse because gay people are in public now". He stopped me right there and flat out said "How about you address what I actually SAID instead of saying that I'm acting like I believe this or that based on what I said".

I paused for a moment and pondered how I could respond to that then I realized that he was correct. Based on what he said I made an assumption that he feels or believes a certain way about something else. I took his words and applied them to different scenarios. He was right, I was wrong for doing that. And even though me and that particular member butt heads pretty often on various subjects he was right in the aspect and I have no issue admitting he was. The context of his post made me believe he virtually thought that homosexuality was contagious or something, so instead of flat out asking him if he believed that I just assumed he did based on what he said, and I was wrong, he corrected me and rightfully so.

Like I said I guess I might just be wired differently. I'll answer yes or no questions day in and day out even if I think they are loaded or bait questions. So to me I have no issue with it. When the guy at work asked me "Do you believe the Earth is 4.6 billion years old?" I simply replied with Yes. I didn't view it as a loaded question or a bait question, I viewed it as a question so I answered it honestly. But when I asked him a very similar question afterward "Do you believe the Earth is 6000 years old?" he didn't answer it with a yes or no response the way I did. Maybe he believed it was a loaded question or a bait question in his mind.

So when it comes to discussing things I felt that was a bit unfair. If you ask me a yes or no question and I answer it with a yes or no response then I would expect you to answer my follow up question in the same manner. Why did he not do that while I did? I extended him that courtesy but I was not given the same in return. That is what confuses me and was pretty much the basis for this thread.

 

Perhaps I am just different than others. If I am unsure whether my yes or no answer to a question will actually answer the question in the manner in which I literally mean it then I will ask for clarification or ask the question to be rephrased so that my yes or no response can convey my actual feelings.

For example if someone simply asks me "Do you believe it is right to kill other human beings?" I will respond with "Yes I do, depending on the circumstances though, do you have any specific circumstances under which you'd like to ask?"

But either way I will begin my response with either yes or no as was requested by the person asking the question. AFTER I respond with yes or no then I will further elaborate asking for clarification on the question.

That's just the way I am though, I guess some others don't operate the same way in that regard. The only time I won't directly answer someones questions is if I honestly just don't know about what they happen to be asking.

Perhaps it's a character flaw on my end for being so willing to directly answer any and everything somebody asks me within reason. That's why I asked the question in this thread in the first place. I was wondering what other people thought the reasons might be.

The responses I've received in here have been very informative. I don't really understand some of the hostility I've received in regards to my question but that's why I asked it in the first place because I didn't understand, so I asked.

 

Is there something that you are confused about in reference to what you quoted or something?

 

No when I say within reason I'm referring to things I literally CAN'T answer due to my job security or something like that.

 

That's why I said "within reason"...things like my personal information of course I won't disclose for obvious logical reasons. But as far as the other things like my most embarrassing sexual encounter or my significant others relatives yeah I'll tell people I don't care. I don't get embarrassed by much at all nor do I care what people think about me. So if you ask me then yeah I'll tell you I don't care.

People used to love playing the childhood game of truth or dare with me when I was young lol

 

I never said it was special it's just different than what many other people are willing to do. No reasonable person is going to walk around telling people their social security number simply because they ask you. But when it comes to things that won't let you steal my identity or disclose job related secrets or put my life in danger or anything then yeah I'll tell you whatever you want to know I don't care.

Your question about most embarrassing sexual encounter is an example. Most people would say that's none of your business, me personally I don't care. I'll tell you all about the time many years ago when I thought the hotel was vacant in the pool me and my girlfriend were trespassing in only to turn around and look up after hearing multiple people on the balcony "wooo'ing" and clapping their hands 5 stories above us.

Many folks would deem that as private and/or too embarrassing to share. Me I don't care, if you ask I'll tell you. If you ask me that then obviously you wanted to know so I'll tell you what you wanted to know.