'You are no longer my mother': A divided America will struggle to heal after Trump era

Same for us. Life is short and challenging. United is the only way. Strength!

 

@alexa I can unknowledge cutting ties with your parents on a specific case : severe abuse.

And I says that when I saw people who got severely dysfunctionnal parents still taking care of them because they were still gratefull to them.

 

7 children, one adopted. We have a business.

Have you ever been homeless, living in the basement of an empty building, no utilities, living out of garage cans with a child? Did you have a childhood where the sole issue of life was how to live to tomorrow, not be beaten to death? I have. I did not grow up in the self indulgent entitle American society of people who believe they are entitled to everything they need and decisions are based upon fairness.

The reality of life - all creatures - is life is a competition. For everything. For survival. For job and economics. For housing. For a mate. For everything. If you want to be president, you have to compete for it. If you want the desirable job, the woman, to win the competition of whatever it is, you have to win it over everyone else that wants it.

The average IQ is 100. Nearly half of people are in the lower half to various levels. Others above it to various levels. But they all have natural talents, and all have natural weaknesses. Having natural talent then is how much can a person develop those talents, while finding how to avoid the weaknesses. In this, some people will have to work with their hands and their backs, manual blue collar labor. I often stated I never look down on such people. I've been there myself. Union steward (unpaid) 3rd shift in a packinghouse house. Shoveling snow for half a day for a twenty dollar bill. They are essential to society.

The daughter I wrote of has two gifts. She is quite cute. She has an inherent mental processing ability - different from IQ directly - putting her in the top 1 millionth percentile. How could she develop both to their maximum potential, rather than use it to just coast thru school and life? Not to get rich - unless she wants to - but for goals. To obtain what SHE wants. For her unique ability, any knowledge, any skill, any experience she obtains becomes part of a singularity of thought to her - something virtually no one can do no matter how hard they try.

Her resume is beyond belief. Won 3 science fairs in different categories, 2 in one year. Publishes in International journals and lecturing PhDs on real life-death topics - while still in high school. She obtained jobs for the purpose of gaining knowledge - solely her decision - when no longer under our authority that on paper she could not obtain as they required specific college degrees such as an MBA, while a Freshman at a full scholarship science and technology university. For the experience, to understand men, an exotic dancer on weekends for a couple months. She was offered a 6 figure contract with a major investment firm resulting from her being the highest income producer by her 3rd month - working part time - and turned it down and resigned instead - as she only had done it to add to her knowledge and skill set.

Everything, anything she learns, because part of a singular set of knowledge to her - and she can use it all - and does. Now she is in the military doing things that even the little I know of I can not mention. Words like "next generation prototype" cost billions give a hint. She has battled male base COs, and won. She has standing written orders that NO ONE of any rank has authority over her other than directly out of the Pentagon. She is who foremost created the program she's in. She's saved lives. MANY lives. In her earlier protocol studies she created. In the military - our sides lives - at the great expect of the other side's lives. Yet very personable - a mix of very serious minded and very easy going - not distracted by the trivial and by losers, jerk-offs and fools.

She does what SHE wants to do. She obtains what she wants. If it doesn't exist, she can create it. She goes mountain climbing. Knife throwing is a hobby, she's traveled the world, has a resume' of such diversity none would believe it - HER choice. She gay. She's married. NOTHING can stop her obtaining any - ANY - goal she wants. In her mid-20s.

Our other children? Each have talents and each have weaknesses. One is a slow learn academically. We do not push beyond his ability. But OMG has he gotten good with his hands. He remodeled our kitchen finer than had we hired it out. He loves working with tools and machines. We guide him to maximize his knowledge and skillsets accordingly. None of it is about making them clones of us. Wouldn't even want that. In each their own talent areas, our goal is they all exceed us. And if they maximize developing the best of who each really is - the result will be the greatest possible adult life by their own measure of success and happiness - to be the best of who they are according to who each uniquely is.

THERE IS ALWAYS ENOUGH TIME FOR WHAT MOST MATTERS. We have given up the vast majority of our business for that priority.

The #1 focus of ours? For her to learn interpersonal skills and that NO ONE will dominate or control her. That she sets HER goals - and figures how to obtain them - in the COMPETITION that life is. Whatever that goal is that SHE sets - because she has EARNED that ability - and continues to expand it. Interpersonal skills are the most important of all as humans are social creatures.

Time and again our daughter phones mostly my wife to thank her for teaching her this and that about very real things. She does not lament a lost childhood. But sometimes says she misses the attention and supervision of her helicopter parents, which she describes us as "her guardian angels" in her youth. We were always there. She also knows she is well beyond either of us by every measure - but is wise enough not to say so.

 

What destruction did he do in the white house?

 

This shows why we HAVE to put Trump away. There will be some who will remain loyal even when he's in jail but I think it will be far fewer once the courts have passed judgment

 

That will take decades to determine, maybe centuries. It's quite possible he has destroyed America as we know it.

 

You need to buy into this or you are just selling Marxism, hatred and everything else evil, Lucifer. Oh ya, that's why you love the Marxists. El Satana

 

In jail for what? Another phone call with lawyers on both sides listening and not agreeing with you knuckleheads.

 

Too funny, but not worth the effort to provide an animated emoji response to you. I can't find any petroglyphs you might appreciate.

 

Here is Lucifer in Perdition

 

The point isn't about me having a homeless childhood or anything. I had parents much like yourself except not so overbearing. And, certainly not willing to keep me or my brother homeless if we needed assistance. What kind of parent would be that cruel? My daughter was abused and had two small children. Unlike your gay daughter. Way to go on that one. You want me to tell her to take a hike to the homeless shelter is with every homeless person in it today has COVID19? Why did you take in an orphan child and adopt that child? Yet, you'd turn your own daughter out if she need a place to get help? Gay or not, I would not turn my daughter or sons out if they need help.

I had a friend that was produced by a father like you. He'd play his boys against themselves telling my friend, you haven't done as much as your brothers in life. So, he'd go do something else. Jumping from one career to another. It got to the point my friend became psychotic and did things that were unethical to satisfy his dad. Fortunately, most of his brothers and sister weren't affected like my friend was. He'd show up with degrees from papermills. Never went to the schools he had certificates of degrees from. He became a con-man. He was the kind of person that if you need brain surgery, he'd be the surgeon without a degree. Bright guy. Like your daughter. Could learn anything and I mean everything and he did. But, he was a con-man. So, who knows if a young woman in her 20's has done all the things you say she has. I'm pretty sure she's either coning you or you are psychotic and coning yourself. Do you have any idea how long it takes to move up the military grades to get to where you say she is?

I can tell you want your children to have a better life than you. But, if one needs to come home for a while or a long time, I'd hope you actually "Love" them. And, not treat them like inanimate objects like they are machines. They are children of God.

 

As minors they are our children. As adults they are their own masters. A very religious and spiritual mom. A non-religious dad. Religion? That is entirely up to each of them. We don't really talk about religion. Of that daughter? I do have a clue what her religion is or if she has one. None of her tribal tats look religious. She's also quite tough, physically competent.

One (or more if it turns out so) of my children being gay is irrelevant to us, other than time spent guiding her regarding potential social dangers and taking actions on her behalf when necessary. We are highly protective of our children.

Con artists do not win science fairs, are not internationally published in science journals, or given full scholarship including room and board to a top science and technology university. Not something that can be successfully lied about - given we're there when it happened. Nor editor of the school newspaper. Nor... nor... nor... Her activities and resume' are astonishing and unbelievable.

I did not mention her rank nor asserted her status is based upon rank. It is based upon what she uniquely can do and what she has actually done. Her team is a small collection of people each with different extraordinary intellectual knowledge and skill sets. Analogous to each highly specialized Stephen Hawkins types. Not really the military type.There is no B team. While I will not explain, the 2 prior teams assembled of military types - super smart -both were killed by what they were attempting to do. Too theoretic, too advanced, too complex, too unforgiving in first generation development - and too willing to follow military command structure for rank - where rankers don't have a damn clue. Those rankers get people killed. They get systems destroyed or cancelled - they cause missions to fail - because they don't have clue. It took the right team - non military type - and someone on the team to say no to rank, make it stick, get away with it, and be proven that no saved the day in the most absolutely critical ways. Munity takes a lot of internal strength, enormous skill sets, self confidence and self awareness about true reality. Only a fool dies for a general's ignorance and arrogance.

Con us? We were trust but verify parents. They learn very young conning us either has no value or is counter productive if a dishonesty. As an adult she has no reason to. With only one exception I can think of did she ever tell us what she is doing until after she is doing or has done it. Any new job we were told of after she already had it. Don't count your chickens before they hatch. Wanting and having are not the same. The other reason is she does tell of frustrations in some real context and asked our opinion - trouble shooting advice so to speak. So we talk it over. She, not us, figures the solution. We're just good sounding boards now that do not say "what you should do it..." Before it was what she must and must not do. But as an adult we will never even tell her what she should do. She lives the consequences, not us. Her decisions.

I gather you think parents are immortal and forever economically secure, a perpetual safety net for children to fall back on. In fact, we could die in an accident or any other way at any moment. We could lose everything somehow tomorrow. At any time our children could find themselves nearly on their own. Nor do we want them tethered to us nor us to them lifelong as a parent-child relationship. We would rather evolve to our relationship being that of equal adults, the relationship voluntary both ways. We want them making no adult decisions dependent upon us nor making any decision pondering our approval. In every way, the more capable they are when entering adult life, the freer they will each always be.

All are told, often, "knowledge is the one thing no one can ever take from you." The size and scope of their knowledge is the size and scope of who they are. Knowledge by study, by experiences, by diversity does no come for free or merely by growing older. Once an area is masters sufficiently, move on to something new and different. Why life 1 life when you can live dozens in sequence, always explaining each their own inner self.

Most people seem to never really grow up. Most people go thru life just putting one foot in front of the other - nothing more. Another reality of life is than no matter a person's family, professional associates and friends, all people also go thru life alone. Being self sufficient means not only so many skills including social and interpersonal skills and knowledge, it also means being about to act and function successfully and comfortable in each their own skin alone. Each will ultimately bear all consequences of their actions, inactions, decisions and indecisions.

That is the flip side to this. They lose worthless and even destructive wasted time in their youth to the benefit their entire future. We sacrifice decades of our free time for them. By not needing us they are truly free. This will result in our being free too. I don't think they would want to be children forever. We do not want to be parents forever. We do hope we connect with each as close relationship adults. But they have no obligation to us whatsoever.

We can, of course, keep repeating ourselves, but what is clear is that your philosophy is overwhelmingly easier parenting. I don't know about your kids or people you know kids. I know my children and I know us. But I also see what happens to most kids. They may master being a child, an adolescent, a teenager, a college kid. But they have no clue how to be an independent successful adult. Maybe they get that college degree.

And then reality hits them in the face when people aren't waiting at the graduation ceremony with the job and all they desire. They sob of being unable to pay their loans, no jobs in their degree field - with a ZERO for a resume and nothing to market themselves with. Posting resume' after resume' on job sites - worthless, generic resume's of nothing but having a piece of paper. Who do they blame? Who failed them? Oh how unfair life is. And most will have a far less successful life than their parents, because success is now harder to obtain.

But they did have a really easy childhood and parenting was really easy on the non-intrusive and little involved parents. The result is millions having to move back in with their parents working a job - if lucky - going nowhere - a just-a-job. They were never prepared to have the greatest and most possible options in a successful to their own measure life. They're generic people. No one is extraordinary to themselves or others by being devoted to the ordinary.

 

delete

 

Trump hasn't yet had to face up to real judges in a real courtroom. I think that when he does, and it will be soon, you will be in for a real surprise as to who the "knuckleheads" really are.