Is it transphobic to not want to date a trans woman?

I don't think you know what the word "transactional" means, in that case.

Then you either don't know what "incel" means or you don't know what "projecting" means. In addition to "transactional."

There are some major female players in the industry, yes.

No such studies have been cited.

Sounds like you are making **** up and haven't actually read what I said. I'm not sure why you are offended by the idea that there are actually people out there who love their wives instead of just seeing the relationship as transactional.

 

Oh no, I know what transactional means.

Fulfilling the emotional needs and happiness of another person in a marriage is not the definition of "transactional". Focusing on the needs of your spouse is the antithesis of "transactional".

Oh I know what incel means. One variation of that would be when a leftist man's wife is dating other men.

But I did cite a study. There are many studies. The information is a literal cornucopia when it comes to modern dating.

Oh I love my wife quite dearly. That's why I've been with her over 20 years and have kids with her.

How long have you been married and how many kids do you have?

 

You described only what you were getting out of the transaction. That's why I called it transactional. I'm sure there is more to your marriage than what you described, but the only things you described were your transactional benefits.

That's not even remotely what "incel" means.

You cited no studies.

I'm sure that's true. But the only things you mentioned before were the transactional benefits that you enjoyed.

Over 10 years. No kids yet, but we will be adopting soon.

I spend all year thinking of the perfect Christmas gifts for her. I go to bed early and lay on her side to warm it up for her because she gets cold. I hold her hand wherever we go. She has a collection of every card I've written her for her birthday, Valentine's, Christmas, and our anniversary, and I never miss writing a card for any of those. I hold her when she cries. I've been there to hold her every time we've had to put a dog to sleep. During one of those instances, she cared so much about the poem I picked out in remembrance that she had it tattooed on her arm. These are the things I remember about my wife. Not what's in it for me.

 

Everyone gets something out of a marriage. That's why you get married. Duh.

Oh but it is. A married leftist can be just as involuntarily celibate as any single man.

I mentioned it. If you want to read it, I'm sure you can figure out how to find it.

Good luck with your marriage, I hope the adoption works out.

I explained the qualities that I find attractive about my wife. You're the one that wanted to have a problem with it.

 

I'm sorry that's the only way you can think of it. I disagree. Again, this is the textbook definition of what "transactional" means.

Again, not what the word means.

Mentioning obliquely =/= cited. But keep believing that garbage if you want. I'll stick with things actually based on evidence.

I appreciate it.

The only qualities you mentioned were transactional benefits to yourself. If that's what you are into, go for it. I don't have a problem with it, I just value things about my relationship and about my wife beyond the transactional. I admire my wife and adore her, as strange as that may seem to some.

 

so if your partner does meth or cheats on you that's fine because you married for love?

every woman alive right now is, so there's no such thing as a traditional woman?

that "industry" exists strictly to shame men. I've never heard anybody use the term incel outside of ridiculing or attempting to belittle other people.

there's no such industry this is just a bigotry toward men.

well if you talk in these circles then you'll know the opposite of an incel is a chad and Chad's are only like 2% so are you sure about that?

This isn't an industry. That's a conspiracy theory.

 

A transactional romantic relationship is when someone keeps tabs of what they give and receive from their spouse

Sounds like you have a transactional relationship, since you keep tabs on what you give to your spouse.

You should get some help with that.

Involuntarily celibate is exactly what incel means.

If you don't want to look it up, then don't.

I already taught you enough today for free in another thread.

Transactional would mean I described what I gave her and what she gave me in return....specifically.

You're the one who gave specific examples.

I simply said she gave me peace, is feminine (not about me), had a good personality (also not about me), and recharges me.

I'm telling you the qualities SHE possesses that I find attractive.

That's not what she gives me, that's just who she IS.

You, on the other hand, didn't have anything good to say about your wife, only about what you do.

What you're doing is called "projection".

 

old relationships are transactional. If you're a partner stopped doing something or started doing something that made you angry you would probably say something. You must compromise in order to live with one another.

yes it means men who have difficulty or no interest at all and participating are somehow bad. And something to be ridiculed.

That's kind of ****ed up.

things like how men should be looked down upon and hated for not getting married or dating?

That's some bible thumper crap.

I wish you the best of luck with that my partner and I tried but never could get it finalized.

Would you admire and adore her the same exact way she put on 300 lb or started using methamphetamine because if not then it's transactional. She does things for you you do things for her that's her relationships work.

 

I agree with most of that but I have to say that if you really care about someone you would do everything you could to stop self-destructive stuff like drugs or huge weight gain.

He's just got some pent up anger from somewhere and he's trying to splash it on everyone else.

 

I would even say that's transactional. If you help somebody like your partner avoid self-destructive behaviors that's good it's not bad that it's transactional it's good that's how we all got here.

the only point I was making is that everyone has their limit and when a relationship becomes a burden you're out.

 

I dunno. I don't think a person really gets anything from going through the hell of getting your partner out of hell, especially since you may be getting nothing but hell in return for the effort. To me, that's a pretty selfless act.

Yeah I suppose everyone has their breaking point.

I'm just of the opinion that the breaking point bar has gotten so low that it's pathetic.

 

Agreed this it's transactional you don't give your partner hell and you expect they don't give you hell.

Well if your cup runnith over... Online dating seems to give people the illusion of a lot of options of high quality partners. And these people will be all for a romp in the hay but that's it.

You said you have kids that are dating age if I'm mistaken I apologize.

Best advice stay the hell away from dating apps.

 

Yeah that's why I'm wading through the sewer for them to get up to speed.

Everything and everyone is "mememememe" now.

 

Will women that are 3s with four or five kids at the age of 25 from 4 or 5 different guys think they deserve some mega Chad.

 

Silly to ask the question since the view expressed in your video is probably one in a million. Literally no one will judge you for not dating a trans-anything.

 

It's not homophobic or transphobic to want to date a person who both is and identifies as the gender you are attracted to.

 

Sorry for my typos. All I have said is whether one is simply not attracted to penises when having sex could mean many things but assuming automatically its transphobia is pointless. Labelling people is the issue. I have found people who are anxious about their own sexual identity ask questions of other peoples' sex preferences, but that was not meant to be a label just shedding some irony.

Is it just me or do the people who do not want to be labelled these days by others sure as hell want to give themselves all kinds of labels for others to call them by and demand they call them by?

For me whether you are some bigot who needs to label people to justify hating them with all kinds of stereotypes and moral judgements OR you are someone insisting you are a this or a that and the proper term for you is this or a that.....to me its all about people labelling others. Me I wish we didn't need so many, period.

Is it just me or is everyone obsessed with their proper label? If you feel good about yourself is it really important what others think about you? Me I am 67, I could give a **** what label you give me. ******* works fine. Doesn't make me lose sleep.

Its not my business nor do I care if someone wants to have anal or oral sex with a penis with a transexual, bisexual, male, doll, on and on, but insist people label them heterosexual. That is their conflicted identity they wish resolved by looking to others to affirm their identity when I think it needs to come from within. That is just me.

I avoidd anyone who needs to disparage anyone for being gay, straight, trans, etc. Not my business. Not something I dwell on.

Unless someone is engaging in sex in a criminal way, i.e., with violence, abuse, children, the vulnerable, without consent, then it is not my concern and in the sense it would be a concern of all society and therefore a criminal matter.

So unless it is a potential or real criminal matter leave me out of such discussions.

Now if the woman smiles at me below and I then later find out she has a penis I am not afraid of her and will smile back and for sure I want to arm-wrestle her but I probably won't go home with her and in any event its a moot point as she would never ask as I am old and smelly.



I think it depends on the lighting.

 

LoL the people that have discovered and labeled hundreds of imaginary genders blame us for creating labels.

You're funny.

 

Where in his post did he mention "hundreds of imaginary genders" or even just his belief in their existence?

 

Do you believe in these 'other genders'?

 

Here's the wiki list of gender identities. It's not numbered and I can't be bothered to count them all. It looks to be in triple digits. Here's my fave:

Xenogender[24][56] can be defined as a gender identity that references "ideas and identities outside of gender".[31]: 102  This may include descriptions of gender identity in terms of "their first name or as a real or imaginary animal" or "texture, size, shape, light, sound, or other sensory characteristics".

I identify as a non-binary pansexual two-spirit platypus. My pronouns are bebop and jockstrap.

 

"Is it transphobic to not want to date a trans woman?"
No, it's being heterosexual.

 

The point was made accusing conservatives of putting labels on people.

Nobody labels people, or puts people into categories based on immutable characteristics, more than leftists.

Leftists very existence is built on their little victim hierarchies and who has more virtue based on who is "more of a victim".

That's what it has to do with it.

 

I'm married. I won't be dating anyone.

 

Perhaps the way to look at this is as follows:... Gay men want men. Trans MTF want men. The difference is that gay men generally gravitate to other gay men. Trans MTF don't want gay men. They want straight men. And the "illusion" of the "transition" is supposed to overcome for the straight man, the recognition that the trans MTF still isn't an actual woman. More, it is also designed to overcome the discomfort of the trans MTF person their unwillingness to simply be gay.

If the point of straight sex is the production of offspring, the trans MTF is still unable to produce this. So, even though cosmetic surgery may produce a male who has implants, that look like real breasts, they still are non functional. It's nothing more than marketing at that point. As for what surgical reconstruction can do, it seems unlikely that a surgically manufactured vag is going to work like or even approximate what a natural one would as an experience to a straight man. So, given that there is no possible outcome that would approximate or ever produce offspring from interacting with a trans woman as a straight man, why would any straight man who expects offspring come to grips with that?

It becomes this "mystery of faith" on the part of the trans person that somehow they could expect anyone else to share in their disforia.

And non of this is to denigrate folks with this disforia. If dude wants to look like a woman, who cares? But "look like" is not the same, legally, biologically, as the real thing. And that's the hubris of the disforia.

What should scare the bejeezus out of folks is that for some reason, progressive folk have latched onto this "movement" as if, somehow, this satisfies their eugenics or malthusian notions of population management, and this idea that only that pushing this into the US public square is appropriate as a measure of both forcing a population decline of the demographics they find offensive.