What if a Loved One Told You They Were G/L/BI?

People should be honest with their partner in all relationships, but most people cannot even name all their partners so this has a snowball's chance in you know where of happening.

The most important thing is monogamy, but again... not gonna happen.

You do know that oral sex and anything not done missionary was once considered to be a perversion (actually they were considered to be deviant behavior). Homosexual sex would not really fit the definition of a perversion simply because of the rate of people "experimenting" as well as the support for homosexual unions has risen steadily. A perversion is something seen as not-accepted by a society, so the very definition disagrees with your assessment.

You only have a few more years before your kind lose power completely, equality always wins out.

I don't understand why who I am attracted to has any baring on your life?
I am not hurting you, your family, or your property. I am not flaunting it (although I know some do, as some straight people do via pda, mardi gras, and movies). I just want to be left alone and have the same everyday rights that you get to enjoy. -Cheers

 

And rightly so.

Boy are you in for a surprise.

When did I say it does?

And I'm not doing anything to you, so what are you whining about?

No you don't. You want to engage in perversion and and make the rest of society pretend there is nothing wrong with you.

 

Good seeing you ignore everything that disproves the very definition of what you are stating. Typical

 

No matter how many times you repeat that statement...it's still your opinion, and in no way changes the fact that homosexuals are deserving of equality under the law.

 

If there exists any such information, it sure as Hell wasn't in post #51.

And no matter how many times you try to write it off as mere opinion, it's still true.

And I never said anything to the contrary, so do feel free to desist from howling at the moon any time.

 

If they ask, they get an honest answer, just as if they ask if they look fat, the outfit is becoming, or their hairstyle looks good.
Don't mean I have to love them less. Don't care for my opinion, don't ask.

 

I think we make too big of a deal about sex in this country as it is. I dont judge anyone for what they do sexually as long as it is consensual and no children are hurt by it.

If a man cheats on his wife then it doesnt mean he doesnt love his wife, it means he found someone he wanted to have sex with. It makes him a bad husband.....Not a bad human being.

If a man has sex with another man, its because men turn him on. Again, I see no issue here. Im not gay, the thought of being with another man is gross to me. However I imagine thats how a gay man feels about having sex with a woman.

Ive been hit on by men in clubs or bars. Do you want to know how I handle it? The same way I would if a woman I wasnt attracted to hit on me. I am respectful but I say im not interested, and that I am flattered that they thought I was attractive but that I am in no way interested. Its no harder to deal with than a woman hitting on you.

Im tired of people telling other people what they can or cant do sexually as long as there are no victims involved. Sex should be FUN!! It should feel good and be something memorable. Before I was married I tried to sleep with as many women as possible because it was fun for me. I didnt lie and act like I was looking for a relationship, and sure enough I found that MOST women were looking for sex as well. They just couldnt be as open with it, so thats why I would mention it up front that I was looking for some fun and if they want to have fun then im down, im clean, no diseases, and I use protection.

Now that im married I am faithful. I love my wife and I committed to being faithful.....Its not easy sometimes but I stay faithful!

But still, too much is made of sex in our society, im not meaning to turn this into a religious debate, but religion took all the fun out of sex. People shouldnt giggle when they hear the word sex. It should be a totally normal action. You see someone you think is good looking, they show interest....Why not have sex?? Maybe you want to experiment with someone of the same sex, but you dont want the social backlash that comes with it?? Why should there be any social backlash??

We have taken something that is natural (sex) and turned it into this taboo thing. Hopefully someday that wont be the case.

 

That is both fair and reasonable.

Yep.

Yes men (or a particular man).

You're correct. Sometime, just ask someone who'd adamantly anti-gay... exactly what harm homosexuality actually causes, and you'll get some of the the most illogical and stupid responses on the planet.

To me (a homosexual man), I don't personally find women gross... but their sex organs aren't a turn-on for me. I knew as a CHILD that boys, guys, men were SUPPOSED to be turned-on by "breasts" and "vaginas"...etc., and I tried being with girls in my early and late teens. But I never made the erotic connection between my brain and private parts... where all the excitement was to manifest itself.

I recognize (from others' experiences) what's sensuous to people of all sexual-orientations... but I am 98.7845% certain, that the female body is not something that entices me sexually. I can assure almost anyone, that a homosexual male, doesn't "choose" to be gay. And that' from a gay guy (me) who tried VERY hard to BE "heterosexual"; and all I learned to do was 'pretend'.

Just as a woman can learn to 'pretend' that they are turned-on and enjoy sex with a certain man (for a limited time only), so it is that a gay man can pretend that females or a particular female will turn them on (sexually)... all the way down to how his sexual apparatus responds within a given scenarios. The key phrase above is "limited time only". Whether it is 1, 5, 10 or 20 years... that charade/acting typically wears thin (and ultimately fails).

Your views are sensible and wonderful. I'm homosexual and somewhat attractive and relatively masculine; attractive women have hit on me. They get a strong hint (that I'm homosexual), especially when I express a rather natural and complete disinterest in them (sexually). I have always had the mechanics and stamina to please a woman; but my heart and mind weren't into it. My mind had to be on other males to get it going-on down there.

The female anatomy just doesn't turn me on and never did. LOL!! I'm a military guy, so I hang out with sizable groups of men fairly regularly; I know what turns them on (in general)... because most of them talk about it freely enough. Before the days of DADT, I used to feign interest to a degree... to keep decent "cover". Many guys would say something, then 'watch' to see how other men would react. Inside, I couldn't be LESS interested but outside I just wanted to "look" cool, yet experienced and confident. Kind of like: 'You guys ain't sayin' nothin' spectacular; I've had better. Sometimes, I'd cleverly endeavor to switch the topic to work or other 'manly' issues; as talking about sex itself was very uncomfortable for me, in an environment where being gay could end your career.

DITTOS!! (Amen.) I would add however, that caring reasonably about the other person, covers a multitude of issues that can arise... not to mention makes the "sex" better.

Right. As long as the person I was with wasn't being used as a blow-up doll (as some use others), I enjoyed all of the sexual-experiences with other men. As I got older, it became more important to me, the effect I was having upon the person I was with. Sex got better with experience.

Excellent. Sounds like you have been a decent guy!! That reasonable level of compassion and honesty goes a LONG way toward making a sexual experience wonderful.

And that is completely admirable, IMO.

That is because SOME people have sought to take the "sex" out of humanity via "religion". Certainly, some seek to control some people's sexuality using the same.

As long as people know the risks and responsibilities involved, I personally don't see a problem.

Good point. Unfortunately... so many have abused and misused others via sexual activity, there are a LOT of negatives that many people count right up front. Religion is often used as a means to bolster that very negativity; it is VERY effective to connect spirituality to 'sexuality'. Problem for most, it that they never find a reasonable balance in the same; they become obsessive.

I'm with you.

 

Both of you guys are GREAT!

You are real, and I want to thank you for sharing some very revealing and intimate thoughts.

I am a heterosexual woman, married 40 years to the same man. . .and I can tell you that, past the "lust" of younger years, I think that the boundaries that separate us as "sexual beings" in terms of gender get a little less significant!

When you love someone, it is intimacy that counts. First, closeness and heart/brain intimacy, but also sexual intimacy. . .but over the years, even that evolves in something that is a lot less grounded in "penis and vagina," and more in enjoying each other's body (I know. . .there is always Cialis. . .but come on, guys. . .they haven't invented a Cialis or Viagra effective for women yet, and that's where they should have started!).

I guess what I'm trying to say is that, if you are committed to growing old with a person, the shape/size of his/her sexual organs become a lot less significant, and the mind, and the hands and the LOVE become the best tools for a satisfying sex life. . .and closeness.

Now. . .I hope I didn't embarrass you!!!

 

Most of my posting is done here at work, so I dont really have the time to quote everything that Johnny and Sadine just posted, but im gonna respond to everything here.........

Johnny-Im glad we are in agreement on most things. I dont pretend to know what it is like to be gay, however I think I have a decent understanding. If I were gay, I would be open with it and I wouldn't be ashamed. Your sexual orientation doesnt define you as a human being, nor should it be judged by anyone else (unless we are talking victim sex like rape, or child abuse or things like that. But that is a totally, unrelated issue from what we are talking about here).

I just hate that we live in a society that you have to even bother explaining who and what you are. I hate that there has to be gay clubs. You should just be able to go into any situation and ask another man if he would like to go on a date, and if he is straight his response would be a polite no, or if he was gay then his response wouldn't have to be hidden in secret or whispered.

Its sad that we still live in a world where if you were to ask another man on a date that you are at risk of being mocked or even physically assaulted.

More and more people are coming around to our point of view though and it is a good thing.


Sadanie--LOL!!! That isnt embarrassing at all!! I think that is great, and I am in full agreement with you!

I love being married, it is great. I have with my wife for 10 years now, married for 4 of those years. Early in our relationship we took a few 6 month breaks. We were young, I was in the military, I was a bit of a playboy and wouldnt commit etc etc. But we always came back to each other and I have to say I absolutely love being married. Sure sometimes the sex drive isnt what it once was because sex with the same person year and year gets a little boring but you learn to keep things interesting. But as you said, the intimate moments are those that keep things fresh!! Especially those moments when your significant other says something that is different from their normal approach, or touches you a new way or things like that....It keeps things fun and exciting!!

Now that I am a little older (im 30 so I know im not old...just older, maybe wiser lol) I sometimes get just as much out of a romantic dinner, and cuddling and just having a good conversation as anything I ever got out of sex.

BUT.....luckily my wife is open about sex like I am. It isnt some scary, taboo word in the house. I wont go into details because I dont want to offend anyone in here, but obviously we try different things. Nothing weird, nothing that involves any swinging or unfaithfulness or anything like that, but just small things and they make all the difference in the world.

 

You sound like an all together, honest, good guy.

You and your wife are lucky and should have a long marriage. . .I'm pretty happy with mine, and 40 years is a "long marriage!"

 

Yeah im honest. Probably too open sometimes but I like being an open book.

Congrats on those 40 years!!! Im sure you will have a blast getting to 50 and 60 as well!!!

 

I am NOT ruling it out!

I love that "old man," even if he is 11 years older than I am!

 

They define their very existance by their sexuality.

 

Source please???

 

You paint with some pretty broad strokes there.

I find it very unlikely that anyone defines their existence by their sexuality.

 

Seeing that is precisely what every professing homosexual does ipso facto, I don't think anyone should care too much what you find unlikely.

 

What is an ipso facto "professing" homosexual? Can you get a degree in it?

 

Yes some gay people define themselves by their sexuality.

Ill give you that one. Its obvious.

And some people define themselves by their religion, some people define themselves on their high school football playing days and never let it go lol. Some people define themselves on their career. Some people define themselves by their kids. Some people define themselves by their looks. Some heterosexual men define themselves by how many women they can get.

So your point is still irrelevant. MOST people define themselves by something. Why should sexuality be more or less of a defining trait than any of those other factors????

A small percentage of the gay community likes to flaunt their gayness for the world to see. It doesnt mean that there is anything wrong with that or that most gays also feel that way.

 

Dixion oh my, a television show, made for entertainment. Because...television is a beacon of truth and reality. Where you can see Kim Kardashian and he wopping two and half month marriage. Where you can see the true live of a person living on the Jersey shore. Right?

Thank you though, that gave me a good chuckle.

Considering you're attempting to make an assertion involving how millions of individuals define themselves...I'll just let the absurdity of your statement stand for itself.

 

In the future, if your intent is to claim my point is irrelevant, dont first demand a source, and then claim its irrelevant.

Most people, their sexuality isnt important enough to be their defining charachteristic that they identify themselves with.

 

Its not a TV show.

 

You're an idiot. hth

It is hardly news - at least to yours truly - that to a certain kind of "person", the absurdity of a proposition is directly proportional to its conformance with reality.

 

And yet their sexuality is what defines them in the eyes of people who are anti gay????