Children are Pointless

Agreed. He better hope Obamacare improves. If not, it's going to be a long time crapping into bedpans at the home.

 

Great post and wouldn't it be great if everybody thought AHEAD to what their life WILL be like with kids and based their decision on that. You're right , there's no "try out" period.
And, to me, people who decided not to have kids at least put some thought into it which is so much better than just pumping them out and being upset when you discover what having kids is really like.

 

you won't have to explain the box of fruit loops or the rubber ducky themed bathroom.

 

I better hurry up and create another diaper filler then!

I can't afford it. I don't want it. I wouldn't Love it.

But hey, I would be a complete POS if I didn't do my part and spawn a few out, so the State and the taxpayers can fund their lives.

I mean, how SELFISH of me. Geez!

Your comment here was so clueless, it made my eyes water with laughter.

 

Sounds like lots of fun!

How does your obvious parental misery benefit your little replica unit's precious life, again?

 

Misery Dad over here seems to be a bit lacking in the Reading Comprehension department.

OP says= I'm not having a kid. I'm responsible. This way I never have to "run away" like you falsely assumed I would.

My woman and I actually made this decision together, too.

So, tell me how I'm not rational, and how I don't know how to communicate with my woman.

Actually, ask your woman if she'd like to contribute to the conversation, as soon as she gets done ignoring you and sleeping in the other room to get away from your obvious Misery.

 

And some people never take into account how the CHILD would feel about being born into poverty or born to someone who thinks it's their DUTY to raise kids or born to someone who regrets having them.
THAT is where their selfishness comes in...they do NOT think of the child only themselves.

 

Omg. Who were you there? Lol. Yes i remember dl. He was ummmm...different?

 

Oh those poor nuns and monks and priests and popes! The few really celibate ones who didn't have kids! Their genetic code will go the way of the Dodo bird ! They must think children are parasites!!
How SELFISH they are!!
.

 

It's actually Power Rangers themed, but whatever.

 

she's trying to justify why she ran off her baby daddy with a facebook style status that's designed for instant validation with likes....

I did it for my baby.....


awwwww isn't that sweet, you failed at a relationship, that now makes your child have to grow up in a broken home and that's somehow BETTER for Jr than making him sleep in his own bed ALLL THE WAY ACROSS THE HALLLLLL. Of course, if someone dares to say that on her facebook status.... she'll delete them, and then post a passive aggressive status like .... "to anyone that doesn't like how I raise my child, go ahead and delete yourself from your friendslist.... I'm about to do some housecleaning of my list, so if you don't make the cut, now you know why"

 

Exactly. I've seen this happen time and time again.

 

another reason I'm glad I've waited to start trying to have a kid. at 20, I don't think I was mature enough to be able to sit down, plan out having a child, and discussing potential topics that could divide us like co-sleeping, discipline techniques, etc.


planning for a child vs planning to have sex and dealing with the consequences of that after the fact are two different things.


my favorite argument... BY FAR.... with parents is "you wouldn't understand, you don't have a kid" like that makes your inability to parent any less valid. I don't have to be a parent to say that parents that forget their kids in hot cars is a bad thing anymore than I have to be a parent to understand that buying jr a candybar at the checkout line to get him to shut up his tantrum is a bad thing

 

Do you really believe that there aren't things that you can't fully comprehend without actually experiencing it? Of course anyone can ascertain the two glaringly obvious examples that you laid out but most parenting issues are much more subtle than whether it is okay to lock a child in a hot car.

It reminds me of one of my cousins years ago. She was quite erudite then (she's a teacher now), and read everything about child rearing that she could lay her hands on. She would expound on the right way to do this and the wrong way to do that. My aunts would just listen to her and smile while shooting each other sideways glances. Years later, after she had children of her own, she recalled how naive she was back then.

Even after that, when my child was preparing to enter this world, I also knew it all. It wasn't until later that I realized how ignorant I was back then.

So, yeah, it is cliche, the "you don't have kids, you wouldn't understand..." That doesn't mean there isn't truth in that. Until you experience it firsthand, you really don't know chit about chit. I know you won't believe me today but a couple of years after your child is born, I'd bet dollars to doughnuts that you'll agree.

 

I do agree, but I also think Fathers need to put their children first. The thing is, putting the other spouse first is the best thing for the children. If you're on the same page, it's ok. Oh, and the whole co-sleeping argument--sometimes co-sleeping is the only way anybody gets any sleep.

 

I know people use the "it's so we can sleep" excuse.... but why is that different than "I will you buy you that candy bar at checkout so you will stop having that tantrum in the store"? it's not about putting your child's needs over yours.... it's you wanting sleep, or you not wanting to be embarrassed in public.

Parenting is never easy, and a crying kid at night is something that can be worked through. I'd rather have a month's worth of sleepless nights than to have a 7 y.o. that "can't sleep" in their own bed.

 

Well, I've actually raised kids, and have done some co-sleeping. It all depends on the kid--each one is different. With my first, he needed co-sleeping some during his first year of life--not every night, but occasionally--a couple nights a week. Until you've lived through the exhaustion, you can't claim that you would truly have a month's worth of sleep deprivation. As he aged, it got less. By the time his brother was born, my older son was 19 months old, and only came to bed with us during storms, or the occasional (maybe monthly) nightmare, and didn't do that unless he woke up at night. Younger son never needed co-sleeping. At age 2 he was putting himself to bed, if we didn't put him to bed early enough. Each kid is different, each set of parents are different. It's easy to say what you will and won't do when you aren't actually facing the situation. Or in other words, one size doesn't fit all.

That said, I do agree that a 7 yr old shouldn't be co-sleeping. I wouldn't do it after age 2 or so. (not counting those occasional waking up scared, and coming to the parent's bedroom). The thing is, the whole "you give in now, you'll never get control" garbage is just that garbage. Kids under age 2 or so can't really be reasoned with. They aren't going to demand candy at the store, etc., because you let them co-sleep. My sons, like all kids, tried the tantrum in the store once or twice. After a visit or two to the parking lot, they decided that wasn't the best idea.

 

I'm all for certain times..... sick, nightmares...

I want kiddo in a crib in our room but there needs to be a gradual weening off and getting to their room.

 

It's different with every child. With my first, we tried the method of putting our son in a separate crib in a separate room. The suggestion is that you let them cry for 15 minutes, and most kids will be asleep. Didn't work with my first son. With my second son, it worked easily. My youngest has always been a better sleeper, and still is at 14.

 

ok... my oldest had no issues with reading..... my second one, not so much.... likes math better. Does that mean we allow bad grades in the subjects they don't like?

 

The best part of kids is making them.

 

No, it means we tutor the one that needs help. I think i don't see the whole volition thing. A child at age 4 months or even a year, doesn't need much. Sleep, eat, poop. If they are not comfortable, they won't sleep. Some kids just need a warm body to sleep. IMHO, it's natural. Until fairly recently (last couple thousand years), co-sleeping was pretty much the norm.

You can't spoil an infant.

 

and sex between adults with children in the room was acceptable practice.... not anymore.


I'm not saying "sex is more important than the kid", but there is intamacy between parents that is neglected when child co-sleeps and you have someone like left leg saying "my child is more important than you are baby-daddy". And now, she's a single mother that has men coming in and out of her life. A much better environment than a stable home.


Always exceptions to co-sleeping arrangements. I just don't think it's a great idea to make a habit out of it.