Why do gays care what their sexuality is?

You made gay people a big collective when you made generalizations about that demographic. I am a member of that demographic. Of course, if one reads carefully, it's clear that in two cases I responded not by affirming the collective, but in denial thereof. With regard to your assertions that gay people view same-sex orientation as a source of pride and defining their identity, my reply of "We don't" does not mean that I'm speaking for all gay people in saying that none of them do; it is saying that a collective "we" doesn't apply. Perhaps you'd have gotten it if I'd provided emphasis, thus "We don't".

In the second instance, I was much more explicit in saying "We don't all think that. I certainly don't". It really can't be any clearer that I am not speaking of gay people as a collective 'we' in this instance. It's an explicit denial that all gay people think alike.

In other places, I have applied "we" in a way which very much fits the context in which it was used: that of discussing anti-gay generalizations being applied collectively.

Now, since you didn't address a single one of my points, I'm going to assume that you aren't here to engage in a serious discussion, but instead posted your thread as means to flamebait. I will therefore be ignoring your henceforth, as I would rather spend my time on more worthy opponents.

 

Fair enough. Where you ever picked on as a kid?

Are you saying they're equal in marriage, job protection, and social standing?

I would like them to define marriage. It makes the process much easier.

 

hmmmm, does being gay automatically get you picked on? i cannot imagine that it does with the exception of ignorant people who pick on othjers because of their clothes, weight and the list goes on

marriage- govt has no business defining it.

equal in job protection- everyone should have the same protection....................none. We are employees at will

 

I think that the government should recognize one union. Call it what ever you want, but one name, one set of privileges, for any two consenting adults.
You could do away with the tax benefits, and make it a legally binding joining of property, and mutual decision making for each other for all I care. We would have paid more in taxes this year if we were in a federally recognized marriage, so not being married actually helped us this year.

I have personally had problems seeing my partner in the hospital, even with a POA. We were traveling and were involved in a minor car accident. She needed stitches, and x-rays. This turned into 5 hours in the ER and the attending physician didn't know if our paperwork was legal in their state. Being a Saturday they couldn't seem to get in touch with the hospital attorney. I was left sitting in the waiting room for 5 hours, worried sick about what was happening. The staff wouldn't even give me updates since I was not family.

I was an aide, and personal secretary for an attorney in Florida, he was a quadriplegic after being hit by a drunk driver. After his death, his partner of 42 years was forced out of the house they had lived in together by his partners family. They had a will, POA, and many other legal documents, but the family was able to challenge the will in court, and won.

This is not fair.

 

It doesn't mean you'll be necessarily picked on, but let's think. They're gay, plus other things as well.

A toi avis. However, without defentions anything goes.

Don't care. I'm asking what there is, and what there isn't.

 

I think you misunderstand the idea behind "pride" movements. They typically occur in segments of the population that are being oppressed. They exist to create unity and help members through the trauma of being labeled as inferior by the dominant and oppressing culture.

Actually, you do. They just call them something different. For instance, every time I turn on a "conservative" information source, it's like walking into a straight pride rally. For people who hate homosexuality so much, they sure talk about it a lot.

Then you have legislative acts like DOMA which are a legal celebration of being heterosexual.
Then there are all the Christianists all over the airwaves proclaiming homosexuality to be an affront to God.
The denizens that pour out of the woodwork to constantly start "Why are people gay?" or "Why do gay people want special treatment, why can't they just marry straight like everyone else" threads on forums like this.

It's funny, for a side that proclaims that it worships individual freedom, the right-wing spend a lot of time and money trying to take away various basic freedoms... just saying.

 

Actually they do, you just don't notice it because it's deeply entrenched in our culture, so incredibly difficult to distingusish it from what's normal... Because it is normal. The celebration of heterosexual love and romance permiate from our music, movie and entertainment industries. It is integrated into and supported by our legal system. We celebrate the heterosexual marriage wih our family and friends. We keep pictures of our wives and husbands on our desks at work, and wear our wedding rings with pride. We cry when our loved ones hurt us, cheat on us, when they are sick, in pain, when they die. We discuss it in our casual conversations with friends. We dress up and do our hair in ways to impress our current and future partners. The question is not how heterosexuality is celebrated, no the question is how it is not. Every day is a heterosexual pride day, and it's in everyone's faces.

And a homosexual could be fired for mentioning their partner. Booted from the military. Ridiculed. Our culture is extremely oppressive, and they don't even realize it as they go about their days celebrating their own sexualities.

 

Why do straight people think that being born straight is something to take pride in? Why do straight people think the fact they are straight entitles them to marriage rights?

 

I'm just a man, no more, no less.

I judge myself as I judge others. I do not care what people do in their bedroom

if you believe in accountability, personal responsibility, volunteering, are law abiding, support smaller govt then I am with you all the way.

What you do under the sheets is of no concern to me.

 

Their very existance is defined by their sexuality.

 

They dont. Two people joining to form a heterosexual couple are entitled to marriage rights, not because they are heterosexual, but instead because heterosexual couples have the potential of procreation. Gays think that just the fact that they are gay entitles them to marriage rights.

 

I'm curious what you think being "a man" has to do with your accountability, personal responsibility, volunteering, law abiding and support of smaller government?
Being "a man" has more to do with your health and sexuality than any of those.

 

How many "straight pride" rallies have their been. How many people go out in public shouting "Hey! I'm straight and I'm proud!". Where's the "straight pride flag"? How many "Straght people dating sites" are there? How many "straight nightclubs" are there?

 

The vast majority of them do. They just don't use the word "straight" because they don't have to, the "straightness" of them is already integrated and assumed by their vast-majority status.

 

Go organize a rally. Go design a flag. No one is stopping you.
There are plenty of straight clubs, pretty much all of them that are not gay clubs. Even in gay clubs there are straight people, you can't deny entry based on sexual orientation.
I'm pretty sure that most dating sites are predominately straight.

 

My point is that straight people don't feel the need to create an "identity" based solely on their sexuality, why do gay people feel the need to do this?

 

You may not, but some straight people do.
Just like not all homosexual people attend pride rallies.

I have sen people wearing "straight pride" tee shirts.
Some men, and women to a lesser degree have contests to prove their sexual prowess.
There have even been straight pride days, and parades.

 

Society created the identity for them through their legal an social descrimination. I look forward to the day when it becomes an insignificant characteristic. Until then, the identity is created to promote unity, an for practical reasons... I.e. gay clubs or any context where sexual orientation tends to matter makes sense to distinguish. I would have no problem if gay pride festivals went away.

 

because if I were a woman i would simply be a woman, no more, no less

because you and i engage in sex differently does not change our accountability and responsibility in life.

 

Just as if you were blonde, you would be blonde... or brown haired, you'd be brown haired... But I don't suppose you go around calling yourself a "Brown haired man" or "blonde man", do you? Of course you don't, because it would be quite irrelevant in most given scenarios. Yet you do so with calling yourself a man, even though the status is irrelevant. Or is it irrelevant? Is it a substancial part of how you identify yourself, and why is it so?

Nor does being a man or woman.

 

Yes, just like every kid at some point.

Only one of those things is the business of the federal government and that is job protection so long as it is a government job. And yes, they are protected. Social standing is not something you can force on people. It is something that develops over time. By continually forcing your "differences" down everyone's throats (sts), you are creating bad blood. Marriage? That's mostly a religious institution. Good luck.

They did.

I would agree with this.

I think this is complete horse(*)(*)(*)(*). We're getting pretty far away from how this thread started, but you are more than entitled to that right.

 

EXACTLY

I do not know one person who identifies themselves as a xxxx woman or an xxxxx man


they are simply men and women. Just because I like a nice juicy burger with lettuce/onion/tomato and ketchup does not mean I need to state that to everyone when identifying myself. In fact, I'm making myself hungry

 

Anyone belonging to a group that is an outlier tends to obsess on the group membership. I was talking to a black man about all the areas of our lives and personalities that were the same and he said, "But I'm black." "Is that really important?" "It's all that is important."

I had a friend who is gay and his partner, who wasn't a friend, asked me what I thought about gays. I said, "I don't really think about gays. I think about people and a persons sexual preferences only interest me if I'm interested in them sexually."

His response was, "Everyone thinks about gays." His partner said, "No, they don't. You do but not everyone does."

The people who knock on your door to disturb your day with proselytizing are never Catholics, Methodists, Presbyterians, Espiscopaleans, Lutherans, Quakers, Amish, or atheists. It's the odd churhes. They are forced to reinforce their membership in the group by getting others to agree with them. So, you get Baptists, Church of Christ, Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, and a host of other oddball churches you've never heard of like the Foursquare Gospel Tabernacle and a bevy of Seventh-Day Adventists spin offs like Koresh and Eden Valley.

You see this same behavior in radical feminists, radical handicapped people, radical fat people, radical, well, everyone.

So, I don't think it's a peculiar "gay" issue. Some fundamentalist Christians view absolutely everthing through that particular prism.

I told a friend of mine that when he came out of the closet as a gay person he had a whole community waiting to welcome him. When I came out of the closet as a born contrarian I was all alone.

 

You're totally dodging . why do you identify yourself with your sex? It's as irrelivant as anything else, right? Or why not?

 

I have to say, I think this post is rediculous...
I am straight, have no interests in same sex sexual relations. I also have friends that are Gay/Lesbian/Bi/and Transgendered, and we don't tend to have long discussions about thier sexual preferences. Two guys I know are legally married, and enjoy that relationship. Do I care? No, no more than I care about my sister being married to a man. In both cases I have listed, I don't want to hear about what they do in the privacy of their homes.
Have I been hit on by members of the same sex, yes, and really it's no different than being hit on by the members of the opposite sex. Since I have no interest in that same sex relation, I simply turn them down.
What I take issue with, is someone telling me that I am a hater, when I don't want to be involved in that sort of union. Why can I not have my personal choice? How does that make me a hater? I don't care about what makes a person happy sexually, unless it concerns me.

On a side note, would I involve myself with Lesbians, or bi women, if given/or taken the opportunity, sure. Do I see that as a double standard? Yes, but I love everything about women, who in the human species is the prettiest gender imo. So by having two women, it's a double of the beauty in my eyes. Two men, on the other hand makes me physically ill at the thought. Doesn't change my opinion of people, as people, just because of sexual preference.

I'm not a hater because of what I like, I'm a hater because of what someone else doesn't like.